I don't think I have mentioned before the difference in "means" values vs "ends" values. The easiest way to determine which is which is what is the bottom line of how you want to feel when those values are present? When you keep asking "why is that important" and get no deeper layers, then you have an ends value.
Remember that 80% of all values are based on:
age 0-7 = imprinting age 7-14 = modeling age 14-21 = socialization
So by age 21 we are already conditioned with beliefs to react in certain ways. That leaves only 20% of our values that are actually based on our own experiences … no wonder there are so many conflicts and so much confusion! Another reason to examine our values and beliefs surrounding them.
Looking at values as either being "means" or "end" values might make it a little simpler. Means values are a way to get to where you want to be and how you want to feel. Ends values are basically what gives your life purpose and meaning. Once you figure out what's REALLY important, you can choose beliefs and habits that keep your life aligned with those values.
What do you want to have?
What do you want to avoid?
If you think money is an end value, ask yourself: what will I have when I have money? Is it freedom? Security? I think of money as more of a means value. The same with health: exercise and eating right are valuable means to get to the end value of health. Another one is time: I used to consider time an end value until I went through this process. Time is valuable because we have a finite amount of time in every day. The end value ... more than time ... is how we want to spend that time: relaxation ... connection ... loving ... serving ...
What do you need to do to live your highest values?
What beliefs do you need to have to live your life according to your highest values?
A good belief to start with: It is possible to live my highest values at all times no matter what!
Remember that 80% of all values are based on:
age 0-7 = imprinting age 7-14 = modeling age 14-21 = socialization
So by age 21 we are already conditioned with beliefs to react in certain ways. That leaves only 20% of our values that are actually based on our own experiences … no wonder there are so many conflicts and so much confusion! Another reason to examine our values and beliefs surrounding them.
Looking at values as either being "means" or "end" values might make it a little simpler. Means values are a way to get to where you want to be and how you want to feel. Ends values are basically what gives your life purpose and meaning. Once you figure out what's REALLY important, you can choose beliefs and habits that keep your life aligned with those values.
What do you want to have?
What do you want to avoid?
If you think money is an end value, ask yourself: what will I have when I have money? Is it freedom? Security? I think of money as more of a means value. The same with health: exercise and eating right are valuable means to get to the end value of health. Another one is time: I used to consider time an end value until I went through this process. Time is valuable because we have a finite amount of time in every day. The end value ... more than time ... is how we want to spend that time: relaxation ... connection ... loving ... serving ...
What do you need to do to live your highest values?
What beliefs do you need to have to live your life according to your highest values?
A good belief to start with: It is possible to live my highest values at all times no matter what!
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